Now
I figured instead of writing slice-of-life updates, I could use this space to add little tidbits of what I'm up to.
Last Updated: Feb 24, 2025 | Archive
Happenings
Ugh, nothing new. I just feel an odd desperation lately, like... the need to claw out of something. My baseline anxiety is higher again and I feel so overstimulated all the time. I tried to take the weekend to recover but I felt a tug of war in me. I would feel moody, stressed and retire to the bed. Close my eyes. Rip my covers away irritably. Paced, rocked, read, guzzled tea by the teapot. Played a cute video game and tried to romance everyone at the same time. Nothing is helping and I feel a bit helpless. I'm used to looking at things and trying lots of things to fix the thing, you know? But I'm not sure what do when nothing helps and I have so many non-negotiables to complete daily. I'll keep thinking about it. I keep thinking I need something extreme! A sensory deprivation chamber! Full hermit mode! But I NEED to figure something more sustainable instead of going nuclear on my responsibilities/social life 😂
Currently Playing
I started playing a cute match-3 game on Steam called Spirit Swap: Lofi Beats to Match-3 To on Saturday and am enjoying it a lot! It's even a little bit of an otome haha. I confess I was eyeing Lulu and Pookie but as most otome, they encourage having a harem and to hit on all romancable options to which I say, SURE! But def Lulu/Pookie first :p I adore the use of pronouns in the game, and the humanity of the writing. I found myself relating to quite a few of the storylines and admired the wholesome ways the characters treat each other! Def reccomend.
From my Shelves
The latest books:
- Reading The Highly Sensitive Person by Elaine Aron. A slog at best and has some harmful advice.
- Started Murder in the Age of Enlightment by Ryunosuke Akutagawa. Beautiful. In a Grove is still living rent-free in my head.
On Repeat
It is an understament to say that I am utterly obssesed with:
- Affection by Fiji Blue
- Stupid by leejean
- Groupie by Michael Minelli and Tony22
- Starstruck by CUBE
- Gotcha by Park Jihoon
On My Needles (Hook)
Still on that washcloth train. Need to get out of this funk 😔
People like you don't use swords. You gentlemen kill with power, with money, sometimes with words alone all on the pretence of doing a man a favour. True enough, no blood is shed. He might even be well. But you've killed him all the same. It's hard to say whose sin is greater–yours or mine.
– Ryunosuke Akutagawa (Murder in the Age of Enlightment)